Ever wonder where all the treasure goblins go in Diablo 3? Those infuriating little punks that vanish through portals with sacks of loot that are rightfully yours! Ever wonder where all that precious, eye glistening treasure ends up? It turns out treasure goblins disappear into the realm of the demon, Greed and as of patch 2.1.0, players lucky enough to kill a treasure goblin have a chance of going through its portal. It wasn’t in the patch notes, so when Brian, Bryce, Conrad, and I got together we were unprepared. We found our way there not minutes after Conrad went AFK. He went to say good night to his girlfriend and told us to “go on ahead”. Sucker. What we found there was astonishing, astounding, and if I might be so cliched, breathtaking. After defeating Greed, and thanks in part to Blizzard’s generous event buff, we walked away with a ton of loot. Approximately a dozen or so high quality gems, three legendary items, one legendary gem, and 23,000,000 gold each. It was beautiful!
The best part was that Conrad came back just in time to see the now barren chest that had not thirty seconds before fallen from the sky to crush Greed into bits and then chew on the leftovers. Yes, the chest significantly bigger than the demon god Greed ate its former master in the most symbolic way possible. Thankfully it did so after spewing loot like someone with stomach flu intentionally going for distance. Also, every time someone clicked on it, the chest took another bite. That occupied us for longer than I’d like to say….
Conrad complained about it off and on the rest of the night. It didn’t help that we were constantly rubbing it in his face. He’ll think twice next time about telling us to go on ahead without him.